What Are You, A Goat Expert?

Be warned, society rant ahead. 


I went to the State Library today to study with Tenuto Tuo. It was pretty cool. He had some food in the city and caught public transport there and home. We took the train home and he got off a stop before me. Once I got off, I had to catch a bus home. 98% of this bus trip was spent with me being forced to hear the conversation of these two guys. One guy and his girlfriend got on and saw this other guy that was friends with the first guy. The couple shall be known as Blondie (he had obviously fake blonde hair) and Girlfriend. Other guy shall be known as Disappointing, because at first he seemed nice and un-bogan but proved to be a bit different. 


So, Blondie and Disappointing just complained the whole 20+minute trip. They talked about how they hate the supermarket company they work for. (mainly Blondie actually) They talked about how their pay sucks, how they treat them like dirt at work, changing shifts without telling them etc. They talked as if they were actually being FORCED to ever work there. Please, if you don't like something CHANGE IT. Yes, it is hard to find a job. Yes, you might not actually be able to find another job for awhile. Yes, you might need to stay at the supermarket to pay the rent. There are plenty of people who have no money and physically cannot get jobs. There are plenty of CHILDREN who are forced to make the clothes you wear for the equivalent of about 5c or less a DAY. I'm really sure your job is not that bad. 


Girlfriend sat there napping on Blondie before sitting up, taking his wallet and just rummaging through it. This was amusing as she was obviously bored by the guys' conversation. 


After a long time of conversing over dumb things like that, Disappointing (who was sitting with various cardboard boxes as he is moving) proceeds to say, "Oh, hey. I'm getting married." Serious. He just slipped it into the conversation as if to say, "Oh yeah. I forgot. I'm getting hitched, bro. Thought you might wanna know. Whatevs." I gained some respect for him after finding out he was getting married. Is that dumb? Shallow? Yeah, probably. But it wasn't really the Hopeless Romantic in me. It was the fact that he was obviously a good enough person to do his girlfriend the honour of "making an honest woman out of her".  I dunno. Anyway, Blondie was kinda surprised. Girlfriend was VERY surprised. She was all, "What? You? YOU?" and I contained from laughing. 


Now, immediately after this announcement, I heard Disappointing go on about hoping he was going to a car from someone. I thought he was hoping to get a car from his soon-to-be wife and I was horrified. He's marrying her for a fast car? No. Turns out the conversation changed VERY quickly and they were now talking about some dead guy. Yeah. He wants the dead guy's car. He justified it by saying, "I didn't talk to him much. He didn't talk to me much either." Nice. 


Some other fun facts. Blondie spent $150 on shoes (if he has that money to spend on shoes, I'm sure his job ain't that bad) and Girlfriend spilt beer on them the night he bought them. Disappointing's been with his girl for four years. Blondie kept looking at me. Obviously, he noticed that I was eavesdropping. The entire time. Disappointing wants to go work at a frozen food factory. Blondie and Disappointing used to work at Nando's. Their old boss is pregnant. Apparently, Blondie found this funny. His first question was, after chuckling, "Is she going to keep it?" Great. 


Basically, this bus trip showed me the selfishness of people, in general. Oh yeah, there were little kids who screamed, "STOP!!!!!" at the bus driver when he missed their (and my) stop. I was willing to punch them and scream, "CHILL OUT! You can get off at the NEXT stop! It's not that much of a longer walk. OR, one of you can run up to the front and ask him to stop. Do manners escape you children???" But that would not have ended well. 


Basically, people are selfish. Now, I am a firm believer that everyone's selfish. Everyone has selfish motives. It makes sense. But, seriously. Some people are just infuriating. I am selfish and I have realised the extent of my selfishness and am wanting to change and be better. I've realised many things I do not like about myself and am trying to change this year. Imma be different and I am determined to be a better person next year when I start my new non-school life. I just cannot stand when people sit around complaining about their lives and what other people do to them. 


Another example. On the train there were these 2 school aged chicks. One no older than 13, I believe. The other maybe 15ish. 13 Year Old was going off about some chick and how she's gonna go home and ask her mum if she can hit this chick because this chick did something or other. I don't know. I just found it horrible. And so immature. I just wish people could deal with their issues and not just complain and whinge to everyone else about how awful "other people" are. I know, this is kinda hypocritical as I do similar things but I am trying. I really am. I am really trying to cut down on gossip this year. It was going well, now not so much. 


In my RAVE (Religion and Values Education. Yeah. No rave party here, guys) the other day, my teacher asked us to rate ourselves out of ten in four areas: Student, Friend, Sibling, Daughter. 
I gave myself some pretty low scores. School ended up being my best area. I know I can be MUCH better at school, but it's my best. This lesson was both kinda depressing, but a wake-up call. I think I needed something to slap me in the face and go, "Hey! It's not everyone else that's always the problem! You've got so big issues yourself! Change 'em! Now!" 


I can definitely be a better friend, I know it. I need to stop seeing the flaws in everyone (sorry guys) and look at all the good things in my friends. There are so many wonderful things about these guys, but lately I've just been getting irritated with everyone. I need to appreciate everyone more and I need to say more supportive things. I am terrible at supporting my friends. I mean, I am a good listener. You can talk to me and I'll listen, but I can't say helpful things. I just go, "Mmm, aw, that sucks" etc. I think I need to pray and ask God that He will just give me the words :)


I am a terrible sister. I am always picking on my brothers. I think I feel like because I've been through more of life then them, I am more of an expert and therefore I know what is good and what is bad. Especially with my brother who is only 2 years younger than me. I'll be all, "Dude, that's so lame," because I think, "I've been through nearly all of high school. I know what teenagers are like. He'll get ridiculed for that etc." And yeah, a lot of it comes from genuinely caring about him, but I go too far. I am much too harsh on them both and am trying (and currently failing) to control my temper. 


I'm not a great daughter. I try to help, but could do more. I backchat and take things way TOO far. I am getting better at just apologising. Even if I think I'm right and they're wrong, I'll just apologise because if I don't, our fight will go on until my mum and I are both in our rooms bawling hysterically. Not cool. Apologising and calming the heck down usually results in a hug and maybe some chocolate. Which one would you choose? 


So, this society rant turned into a self-evaluation and I am glad. 


A few weeks ago I found this site called the Day Zero Project. Basically, you make a list of 101 things you want to complete in 1001 days. I started one while writing this post. My 1001 days ends on March 3rd 2014. Seems so far away, hey? I'll be in my third year (probably out of four) of university. 


I'm looking through randoms' lists and someone had LEARN HOW TO MAKE MOCHI! AH, GOJO!


Anyway, I really like this whole Day Zero Project. It'll get me motivated to do these things I'd love to do. Cause no one wants to make a list like this online and fail. 


Here's the link to my project. I don't have many things so far, but I'm looking:
http://dayzeroproject.com/user/ClearlyUnfocused


Check it out :)


This year (and until March 3rd 2014) I am gonna change, bros. Gonna be a better person. Ooohs. RELEVANT SONG. This is one of My Songs for the year, bloggers. LYRICS:


Yesterday
Is not quite what it could've been
As were most of all the days before
But I swear today
With every breath I'm breathing in
I'll be trying to make it so much more

Cause it seems I get so hung up on
The history of what's gone wrong
And the hope of a new day
Is sometimes hard to see (what you see)
And though I'm finally catching onto it
And now the past is just a conduit
And the light there at the end is
Where I'll be

Cause I'm on the up and up
I'm on the up and up
And I haven't given up
Given up on what
I know I'm capable of
And I'm on the up and up
I'm on the up and up
Yeah there's nothing left to prove
Cause I'm just trying to be
A better version of me
For you
A better version of me
For you

To be prosperous
Would not require much of me
You see contentment is the one thing
It entails
To be content with where I am
And getting where I need to be
I'm moving past the past
Where I have failed

But I'm finally catching onto it
And now the past is just a conduit
Right there at the end
Is where I'll be
Oh

Cause I'm on the up and up
I'm on the up and up
And I haven't given up
Given up on what
What I've gained from love
And I'm on the up and up
I'm on the up and up
Yeah there's nothing left to prove
Cause I'm just trying to be
A better version of me
For you
A better version of me
For you

You never cease
To supply me with
What I need
For a good life
So when I'm down
I'll hold my head up high
Cause you're the reason why

I'm on the up and up
I'm on the up and up
And I haven't given up
Given up on what
What I've gained from love
And I'm on the up and up
I'm on the up and up
Yeah there's nothing left to prove
Cause I'm just trying to be
A better version of me
For you


Especially the frequently repeated line, "I'm just trying to be a better version of me for you," but I alter the grammar slightly to be, "I'm just trying to be a better version of me for You." 




Quote from The Amazing Race episode I'm watching as the title, by the way.